As the 2020 global pandemic for COVID-19 becomes forever etched in our history, most of us will remember how the term ‘lockdown’ moved from a novelty to a serious psychological threat. At the point of writing this blog, it’s not clear just how vast and integrated the knock-on effect of lockdown will be, but for most of us it’s confronted us with conversations we’ve never had to have before.
Being confined indoors, or a specific area for an extended period of time brings out the deeper facets of our personalities and stress coping skills. Several years ago an article by Maya on Money spoke to money personalities – and whilst this has perhaps been overlooked or avoided by many, lockdown will most certainly be a catalyst for addressing it now!
Money has been cited as the biggest reason for divorce, and differing attitudes towards money in any relationship can cause friction. So let’s take a look at some basic ‘money personalities’ and you can decide with which you most identify.
This may not only help you manage your relationships in both trying or triumphant times, but also how to go about managing your wealth creation as a couple, family or shared living arrangement.
1. The Spendthrift A spendthrift tends to be extravagant and spontaneous with regards to money matters. However, sometimes they can be irresponsible and need protection from making financial mistakes and getting into debt that they can’t afford.
2. The Saver Someone who saves may have quite modest tastes and needs, and long-term they may well reap the rewards of their cautious approach. However, their financial prudence and love for budgeting could be a turn-off for someone who is not that way inclined.
3. The Cinderella Maya Fisher-French refers to the ‘Cinderella Complex’ in her article when she considers a woman’s unconscious (or conscious) desire to be cared for. Some people are simply looking for a partner who can spoil them, which Fisher-French refers to as a Blesser.
4. The Financially Independent Other people make it their main focus to become financially independent so that they can manage their money and responsibilities on their own. They pride themselves on working hard to become financially organised and not needing to rely on anyone else. This type of person may fret about being pulled down by someone who is less financially astute.
5. The Power Hungry Power plays can arise if someone uses money to wield power over others. The adage, “he who holds the gold, makes the rules,” may be true in some relationships – especially if there is a big difference in earnings. Money can create a shift in power that can be easily abused if all parties are not careful.
Rules should be agreed on by all who rely on each other. Different money personalities can be compatible if a balance is achieved; everyone needs to recognise the strengths they are bringing to the relationship.
For example, a Saver can help a Spendthrift to avoid some financial miscalculations, while a Spendthrift can teach a Saver to loosen up and enjoy splashing a bit of cash sometimes.
Likewise, someone who enjoys spending money on their family could be compatible with those who enjoy having money spent on them.
If there has been a major change (loss of income or work for any of the income earners in the home) it can be enormously stressful if we don’t have the words and tools to have better conversations about earning, saving and spending the household money.
It’s powerful to know what type of money personality you are and to find synergy in your relationships. It’s not necessarily a question of having the same attitude and approach to money issues, but rather finding compatibility and compromise.